Articles

What to do if you disagree with your partner about having kids

If you've just started dating:

Just end it, and find someone else with similar goals as you!

If you're in a long-term relationship

You should probably talk it out with your partner.

Why your long-term partner might not want kids

1.

Financial strain

2.

Concerns about partner's involvement and parenting

3.

Potential body changes

4.

Repeating unhealthy family patterns

5.

Loss of friends and/ or social life

6.

Impact on lifestyle

7.

Concerns about overpopulation/ societal problems

Why your long-term partner might not want kids

8.

Dislike of children

9.

Unwilling to accept the responsibility

10.

Fertility issues

11.

Lack of parental instincts

12.

Interest and commitment in pursuing career goals

13.

Not part of their life vision

What to do if your partner changes their mind

1.

Take some time with your own feelings about this situation

2.

Explore your partner's surity in their decision

3.

Explore the issue with kindness, curiosity and compassion. Instead of asking why they don't want kids, talk about how they arrived at their decision.

3.

Talk to your partner explicitly about their non-negotiables early on in the relationship

When to call it quits:

1.

If there is no space or room for conversation/ negotiation/ consideration/ compromise

2.

If the issue is causing significant mental/ emotional distress

3.

If an ultimatum is made for a decision and the date of decision passes without a decision

4.

If the differences in your opinions affect your quality of life

When to keep going with the partnership

1.

If both of you are unsure, but not resolute in your decision

2.

If the relationship is going strong with excellent communication, respect, care and consideration and you plan to revisit the conversation in a predetermined, acceptable amount of time

3.

A willingness to consider additional options together (e.g. adoption/ fostering/ egg freezing)

Read full article

Is this article useful?

Leave your review!